My first doctoral dissertation chairman was Dr. Albert AX.  He did the famous fear and anger studies back in the late 1930s.  So the definition of fear to me is most likely different than most.  Fear is commonly defined as an unpleasant feeling in the presence of danger.  This is a step advanced from anxiety which is the a similar feeling with no present danger or another definition where there is imagined danger..

This writing prompt allows me to understand something about myself.  As a baseball player I learned to control my fear. Iin a batter’s box with a 9 in sphere coming at you at 95 mph has risk but the fear is in not hitting it as that was what I got paid for.  Once I mastered hitting the ball I saw it as a challenge.  So I learned to alter my perception from fear to challenge.

So for me to have a fear I would need a significant change in blood pressure and pulse rate and the autonomic response of perspiring.  Don’t misunderstand me, if I was being held in an ISIS camp I would have FEAR, worse if you dropped me in South Chicago.  But as those are only anxieties because I keep away from those places I do not consider them fears.

The one fear, at least I classify it a fear, is fear of rejection from a woman of interest.  I have many female friends and they, by nature, can be fairly judgmental and outright nasty.  Because I have no romantic interest — no problem –fire away.  But I avoid women who I am attracted to because of fear.  I get all the physical signs.

So my technique avoids anxiety and fear.  I am surely alone, but fearless.  Since I avoid fear enhancing situations I have few fears.  I fear bugs as they are a number one killer of people.  I don’t fear death but I am not running to it and certainly don’t want to be felled by a bug– an insect.  So I live in the mountains where they don’t thrive.

I don’t fear the inevitable.  I don’t fear my dog dying but I do keep him on a leash so he decides to not look both ways.  This is a precaution that allays anxiety and fear.  Some people can’t trust their safeguards and worry about things that could happen.  This is where years of failure (experience) comes to bear.

Bottom line, I have so many things I can be anxious about and can even advance them to real fear but I choose not to do so.  Thirty one years of forensic neuropsychology and treating anxiety has given me skills that are resistant  to fear.

Now if I could only talk to her.

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